Have you ever really thought about the fact that God created you. I mean really thought about that, he knew your whole life story before you were born! "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." Jeremiah 1:5 To me this is absolutely amazing and something that is so difficult to get my mind wrapped around! That God the creator of Heaven and Earth would design me by hand is just incredible to think about, isn't it?!
As I have experienced many great losses in my life the past two years, it has made me wonder how I can handle all these losses. The more I think about it the more I am convinced that God creates us all with different types of strength to deal with certain kinds of hurt in our lives. I believe that since God knows our life story before we are born, he designs us with the strength that we need to get through the hurt that our life will have. This is my own theory, however I believe that our God loves us so much that he wants us to reach out to him in the difficult times in our life and fully rely on him. When fully relying on him, he will grant us peace and strength to survive the losses and hurt in our life.
You may ask why would a God who loves us so much allow us to experience such loss and hurt in our lives. I believe that we experience these losses and hurt to make up stronger as people but also in our faith. I know that personally I would not be able to make it through my losses and hurt without my faith in God. Without that faith, I would not have the hope in knowing I will see my baby girl, my Mom, my Grandma, and many other family members in Heaven! "Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1 It is also with this faith that I know JC and I will be blessed with children in God's timing! I know that everything that happens is in God's plan, that he is not surprised by anything that happens and that he loves us as his children.
A saying that JC and I hold dear to that our pastor Melissa taught us is: "I don't believe that everything happens for a reason, but I do believe that God creates reason out of everything that happens." This is a great comfort to us, and has become something that we live by.
As much as it hurt to lose our precious Maggie Grace, both JC and I take refuge and know that God is and will continue to use her story to further his kingdom! We know that her life as short as it was, was not a waste. God created her in is design and I am thankful that I was able to carry her for nine months, that I had/ have the privilege to be her Mommy and love her everyday, she will remain in my heart forever and always!