Saturday, September 22, 2012

Changing of Seasons

Tonight while JC is at church for worship practice, I decide it was time to switch out my summer wardrobe for my fall/ winter wardrobe. Problem is I don't have many clothes that fit for the up coming winter, only one pair of jeans that fit me right now. So as I tried to sort through stuff I thought might fit me it just put me in a sour mood and got my mind spinning in many different directions. 

As I folded my summer clothes and put them in a tote, and replaced them with long sleeve shirts and sweatshirts, I was thinking about how much I wished I was pregnant right now. As I made room for my pants and pajamas in one of my drawers I decided it was time to take my maternity jeans out. Doing this really made me sad, I felt like I was really saying that I won't get pregnant anytime soon. This past spring I even bought a maternity winter jacket on super clearance (this is how confidant I was at the time that I would be pregnant by the winter time) so I would have it if I needed it.

Now I am stuck in this body and with out a baby growing inside of me, boy do I miss that beautiful round belly! I started thinking about how I was SO close to making my dream come true of becoming a mommy and then to get it all ripped away is such a tease and a horrible feeling. I really feel like my hopes of getting pregnant is pretty much gone, I feel like I may never get pregnant again. Which you could imagine is not a great feeling to have. I am still relying on God and trusting in his plan, as hard as it is to be patient & really not understand his reasoning.

The weather here has gotten pretty chilly and fast, we had our first freeze earlier this week.... YIKES!! The first in the country, oh the joys of living in the "ice box of the nation"! So this prompted me even more tonight to switch out my clothes for warmer ones! As I was folding clothes and feeling down, I had my sweet puppy girl Zoey keeping me company. She really knows me and can sense when I am sad and having a hard time, I am so thankful for her! I know that sounds silly but she is truly a HUGE blessing in my life! 

I hope you all have a great rest of your weekend!


Rain on the window

Yummy Pumpkin Spice bread

Yummy Snickerdoodle Cupcakes!

My sweet Zoey girl!

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