I started out the new year (exactly one month after Kylie was born) checking my self into the hospital for sever postpartum depression and would stay there for five very eye opening days.God met me there in ways I have trouble explaining, but He was there with me in that all white hospital room as I sat on my bed reading my Bible and praying that God would heal my mind and correct my thinking. By the grace of God (and good depression medicine) I began to come out of my depression fog.
Words can not describe to you the love and appreciation I have for my husband as he took care of our newborn daughter for five days by himself and never once judged me for deciding to check myself into the hospital. He was always full of encouraging words and loved me through some of my absolute worst days. This depression that took hold of me not only consumed my mind, but my body (made me feel physically sick) and challenge my faith in God more than ever before. Knowing that depression had been the ultimate thing that consumed my Mom and made her take her own life, I knew I had to be proactive and truthful with myself and how sick I really was.
As you know our year went on and shortly after feeling better, JC was let of his job and our next move was moving in with his dad in NH. Having been married and on our own for about 3.5 years, it was and still is an adjustment to not have our own place. However we know that God placed us here at this time for a specific reason.
As JC and I fumbled our way through our first year as parents and living with a parent, I found running to be an unbelievable stress reliever and enjoyed doing it so much while pushing Kylie in her stroller. (I'm excited to get back into running after baby boy arrives!) Any way I took on new physical challenges and struggled with my faith and felt a little lost this summer wondering what God had in store for us... little did I know that we would be blessed with another baby!
As we head into 2015 I have chosen another word for this year, it's one that I know will challenge me all year. TRUTH... knowing in my heart of hearts that God is with me always and being truthful with myself and where I am in life. I just want this year to be about being true to myself, in what I believe in and in challenging myself to live healthier and push myself to becoming a better version of myself.
Wow that sounds a little overwhelming now looking back at it, but life is really about taking each day one at a time, counting your blessings & thanking God that His mercies are new every single morning! I think I'm done rambling for the night... but just wanted to share where I am at and how excited I am about this new year ahead of us! I pray that you may find your one word to live by this year and that it may challenge you and show you new things each day! Blessings to you my friends!
XOXO Bee
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| New devotional journal I've started though SheReadsTruth.com Loving it so far! |
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| Incase you were wondering about little man, he is doing great, growing right on track & last ultrasound they saw no bright bowel. We are so very thankful for this healthy little boy and CAN NOT wait for him to join our family! |
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| Our Kylie Joy is getting more personality everyday, making us laugh and we think she will be walking very soon! (oh boy!) |
bee! this post, thank you lady! we really should talk... we have much more in common that i thought. i'm hoping to go to michael's in keene soon... i'd love to have lunch with you if you have time :)
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